There were so many times I look back and see how much I didn't love myself. 

I have this harsh inner critic that tells me I will never be good enough.  Good enough for what?...for anything.  This is a belief that was embedded at a very young age.  I love my parents and grandparents, and there were many moments where I felt, and believed, their love was conditional.  They gave me so many wonderful memories, and the harsh words and behaviors stuck around for a very long time. 

When I made good grades, I was praised with words and money.  When I made a B, my grandmother told me how angry and disappointed she was in me with words I would never speak to my children, and a lashing I would never wish upon anyone. 

When I was "too large" at the tender age of 11, I was brought to Weight Watchers, where I would weigh in weekly in front of other women twice my age.  I began noticing the difference in my body compared to others.  I...